Inter-Activ: Presenting & Influencing

Call today on 01489 785448

Email: gmeikle@inter-activ.co.uk

What is charisma and can it be learned?

If you're new here, you may want to subscribe to my RSS feed. Thanks for visiting!

bill_clinton.jpg


Charisma, some people have it and some don’t! How often have we heard that comment. everyone agrees that is an important and desirable characteristic whether you are a salesperson, a team leader, a presenter or a teacher but it seems such an intangible thing. Wikipedia, the online reference source defines it as follows:
The word charisma (from the Greek word χάρισμα (kharisma), “gift” or “divine favor,” from kharizesthai, “to favor,” from kharis, “favor”: see also charism) refers to a rare trait found in certain human personalities usually including extreme charm and a ‘magnetic’ quality of personality …
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charisma

If anything this definition just serves to reinforce the belief that it is rare and “god given”. Well I happen to disagree. I believe that everyone is intrinsically charismatic but that, through conditioning, many of us have learned to suppress our natural charisma. In my workshops I use a range of methods to help people rediscover their own innate charisma but I’d like to share with you three ideas to get you challenging your own limiting beliefs about how charismatic you are.

Tip 1: Stop telling yourself that you are not a charismatic person.
The language we use when we talk to ourselves is much more powerful than we think. If you keep focusing on your lack of charisma and reminding yourself of it, should you really be surprised when you seem to be repelling rather than attracting others.

Tip 2: Mimic some of the physical behaviours of people you consider to be charismatic.
If you were at a networking event and you walked around with your shoulders slumped and your head down would you be more or less charismatic? If you gave only fleeting eye contact to others, gabbled nervously, and spoke inarticulately how will others rate you in the charisma stakes? Act as if you were charismatic by observing what charismatic people do and then emulating some of those traits. You will be amazed at the effect it has, both on others and on yourself!

Tip 3: When speaking to others have the intention of raising their status and self esteem.
Charismatic people don’t only look and sound confident and authoritative, they also naturally build up the status of others whenever they interact with them. Bill Clinton is an excellent example of this. I know someone who met him and described vividly how, when he spoke to them, he gave them his full attention, listened intently and then responded with a comment that validated and built upon whatever they had said. He never tried to put them down. He knew the secret that when you raise the status of others in this way, you raise your own status too in a non threatening and magnetic way.

So there you have it. Some thoughts on how to develop your own charisma. Imagine the effect it could have on your own career or business success. I know these ideas work because I have personally used them myself. So do yourself a favour and give yourself a charisma transplant today.

[Slashdot] [Digg] [Reddit] [del.icio.us] [Facebook] [Technorati] [Google] [StumbleUpon]

How do I memorise a speech?

Memory.JPGAt my local Toastmasters club tonight one of our newer members asked me how I memorised speeches. Now that’s an intriguing question especially for me since I don’t normally think consciously about “memorising” memorising speeches at all. When I questioned him further on why he wanted to know, he said that he wanted to deliver interesting and informative talks that would be entertaining AND would motivate his audience to visit his upholstery shop.

My advice was as follows:

  • Start with a clear outcome - know why you are speaking and what you want your audience to do as a result of your talk. Having a clear goal will serve as a powerful compass for your creative unconscious and help you create an appropriate narrative “on the fly”. Once you learn to trust this process, giving speeches becomes a lot more fun for you and your audience.
  • Set yourself realistic milestones. I’ve been speaking in public for more than 30 years so I have learned a few tricks along the way and have developed a lot of self belief about my ability to speak without notes. Start my working with a an abbreviated script and then , each time you speak, cut down your notes a little at a time until you have proven to yourself that you can speak with just key words or bullet points on index cards.
  • Don’t be too self critical, particularly to begin with. It’s all too easy to remember what you forgot to mention but it’s often much harder to notice what was good about your presentation. Learning to focus on your strengths rather than your weaknesses will build your confidence, squeeze out your errors, and grow you skill much faster than focusing on your shortcomings.
  • Experiment with different memory systems. For example the great Greek orators understood the power of storyboarding. They would divide their speak up into key segments and then assign a mental image to each section. They would then link these images together in a sort of mental chain or sequence. It is much easier to memorise a sequence of images than a word filled script, yet each image provides the key to unlock your memory to the verbal content surrounding each theme. In modern times, Well chosen images displayed on a PowerPoint can help the audiences memory as well as your own.

If you any other suggestions, please let me know and I’ll happily share them with the rest of the on-line community. Just post a comment below.

[Slashdot] [Digg] [Reddit] [del.icio.us] [Facebook] [Technorati] [Google] [StumbleUpon]

Don’t forget to plan a strong conclusion

the_end.jpgI am always surprised by the number of presentations I see that start of well but just seem to fade out at the end leaving an awkward silence as the audience try to work out whether you have finished or not. Not only does this undermine all the good work that you did at the start of the presentation, it also it eliminates an opportunity to reinforce your key messages one last time.

For most presentations, a good close consists of a clear concise summary of;

  • The context of the presentation
  • The problem faced by the audience that your content can solve
  • The three key reasons why your recommended course of action will provide the desired solution
  • A call to action
  • A confident “Thank you” and a request for questions

Get this one right and your chances of success are greatly enhanced!
So don’t miss out on this vital opportunity to reinforce your main arguments and tell the audience what you want them to do next.

[Slashdot] [Digg] [Reddit] [del.icio.us] [Facebook] [Technorati] [Google] [StumbleUpon]

What to do with your hands?

iStock_000005690712XSmall.jpgIf you have ever stood up in front of a group you must have been faced by that age old conundrum - What do I do with my hands?

Do I hold then in front of my crotch as If i am protecting my modesty? D0 I clasp them behind my back like Prince Charles?, Do I stick then in my pockets to stop myself picking my nose? Do I cross my arms?, Do I hold on to a pen with both hands ain the hope that it is some sort of talisman to ward off the evil eye of my audience?

My recommendation is that you use your hands purposefully to punctuate, physicalise and support your verbal messages.

There is interesting research that suggests that hand gestures are an essential part of our communication process. If we restrict our gestures, our speech becomes less fluent and we may actually find it more difficult to find the right words!

Ok but what do we do with our hands when we are not gesturing?

Great question. Imagine that you were standing upright and that you were calm and completely relaxed. Notice how your hands would just hang down by your sides, completelty at ease. This is the natural place to rest our hands and arms when we are not using them.

I know it will feel a bit strange at first, especially in a presentation where you may be initially feeling anything but calm and relaxed, but trust me. Once you become used to it it will feel comfortable and will actually help you manage your nerves.

Now, from this position you have full mobility of your whole arm from the shoulder and can make nice big, open gestures. Contrast this with many speakers who gesture from the elbow only and look as if their upper arms are welded to their sides.

So now you know, go out and apply it.

Gavin

[Slashdot] [Digg] [Reddit] [del.icio.us] [Facebook] [Technorati] [Google] [StumbleUpon]

Dissolving fear of public speaking by surrendering

If you have a fear of public speaking let me start by reassuring you - YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

The good news is that many millions of people have already found ways to dissolve, diminish are control their fears so, if they can do it so can you - Right!

One of the simplest and most powerful techniques that they use is based on the realisation that the only thing that gives fear it’s power is the fear itself.   Imagine you are in a busy underground train on your way to work when it suddenly stops in between stations and the lights go out.

What does that little voice in your head start to say?   “Oh my god!   Maybe we are going to be trapped!”   Maybe there is a bomb on the train.   Maybe we are all going to die.”   With those thoughts, come  a whole lot of physical symptoms , following along as inevitably as a line of baby ducks following their mother.

Sweaty palms, racing heart, churning stomach, shallow breathing, you know the drill.  All the same symptoms you get when you think about standing up in front of an audience to speak.

Now imagine that this event happened again.  The train stopped,  the lights go out and that little voice in your head says “You’re going to die!”    But this time, instead of giving in to the fear you surrender and  and welcome the possibility that you might die.   “Bring it” on you say to yourself!   “Maybe today is a great day to die!”      See What happens when you change your thoughts.

No sweaty palms, no palpitations, no flushing, no stomach cramps, just a sense of inner calm and peace.

So you could do exactly the same thing next time you start to feel nervous about speaking in public.

Step 1 - Notice what you are afraid of - looking stupid, drying up, saying something stupid, fainting etc.

Step 2 - Instead of fearing that possible end result, surrender to it.   “OK, if I am going to faint, so be it, it’s not the end of the world - bring it on!”

Step 3 - notice how this acceptance of what you fear totally changes your reaction and dissolves the fear.

So now you know what to do.  All you have to do is practice it!   I said it was a simple technique but I didn’t say it was easy.   It will seem counter intuitive at first but you have to recognise that you are changing a habit and that means taking control and doing something different.   The benefits far outweigh the small degree of effort required - go for it and let me know how you get on.

Gavin Meikle
The Presentation Coach

[Slashdot] [Digg] [Reddit] [del.icio.us] [Facebook] [Technorati] [Google] [StumbleUpon]

Don’t start creating your presentations in PowerPoint

I was running a workshop on Making the Most of PowerPoint the other day and almost the first tip I shared with the group caused an audible WOW! throughout the room! Not a bad start to a days training. So what was the secret I shared?

I suggested that instead of going to PowerPoint you open up a simple text editor such as Notepad (The free one built into Windows) and that you create your headlines and if necessary your indented bullet points in there as an outline.

outline_text.png

This text file, once saved can be imported directly into PowerPoint using the File then Open and then selecting All Outlines from the drop down file type menu. Select the notepad file you created and then click Open.

PowerPoint will instantly create a set of plain slides with each non-indented text line as a slide title and the tab indented text as bullet points. All you need to do now is choose a template and add any appropriate images.

Why bother doing it this way?

1) If you cut and paste text directly from word, it also imports words funny formatting codes and the text and font are all messed up.

2) If you create the story outline in a test editor you can read through it to see if each headline flows logically on from the next and tells a story. This will help to keep your presentation flowing rather than thinking of your slides as a set of disjointed images.
Let me know how you get on.

Gavin.

[Slashdot] [Digg] [Reddit] [del.icio.us] [Facebook] [Technorati] [Google] [StumbleUpon]

Projecting Authority

eye_contact.jpgWhether you a presenting to one person or one thousand, the ability to project authority and credibility is crucial.     The question is how do you do it?   

Authority, or “gravitas” as some people call it, is a desirable yet nebulous characteristic that is closely related to charisma.  We all recognise it but are hard put to identify what it is a person says or does that creates it.

Some people undoubtedly have more natural authority than others but I believe that everyone can learn some simple techniques to “turn it on” at will.

Having studied many different presenters I have identified 5 key cues that project a perception of authority and credibility.

  1. Eye contact  - Practice making and holding eye contact for up to 5seconds
  2. Maximising personal space through stance - Develop an open upright, relaxed stance
  3. Head stillness when speaking - High authority figures keep their head still when they speak (helps with eye contact too)
  4. Being comfortable and easy with using pauses of varying lengths.  If silence is golden then pauses are “nuggets of gold” to quote my friend Marian Way
  5. Eliminating face and hair touching - These mannersims lower your percieved status so learn to eliminate them.

Don’t take my word for it though, test out this by experimenting with these techniques yourself and observe others who you consider to be high credibility speakers and you will see that they are universal.

NB: Lots of people comment on my posts and thus add value to the whole topic so please join them in sharing your views and examples because it will help all of us.

[Slashdot] [Digg] [Reddit] [del.icio.us] [Facebook] [Technorati] [Google] [StumbleUpon]

Updated Website Using Wordpress

Just to let all my subscribers know that I have recently had by old static website converted to an easily up-datable one using word press. As a result the address of my blog has changed to www.inter-activ.co.uk/gavins-blog/  I hope the change doesn´t cause anyone too much inconvenience and that you will continue to enjoy reading my posts-

Regards

Gavin

[Slashdot] [Digg] [Reddit] [del.icio.us] [Facebook] [Technorati] [Google] [StumbleUpon]

©2008 Inter-Activ Presenting and Influencing | Presentation skills training & sales coaching Dorset Hampshire & Sussex